ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
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