Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Randomize
