wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Randomize
