Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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