so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Success! We fucked roommates!
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