I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize
