Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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