You work out of a Hotel?
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
