'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
