She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
