I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
