Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
