i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Randomize
