But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Randomize
