She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Randomize
