Are we in a gay sports bar?
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
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