Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
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