I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
I need mimosas to revive my soul
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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