don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
