id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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