I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
I want her autograph on my taint
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
