i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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