im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Randomize
