dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
