He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Randomize
