Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Randomize