I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
