The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
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