Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
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