How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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