She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
