Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
it's like heaven, but drunker
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
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