lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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