Pappa wants mamma naked
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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