I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Randomize
