Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
