Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
