The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
