Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Randomize
