Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
