i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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