but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize