Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Randomize
