he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
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