she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize