She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
