I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
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