where am i from again
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
