He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Is it penis luge time yet?
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
You're a waste of cheezeits
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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