Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
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