If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
